Airbnb Bait and Switch Ruins Miami Birthday Trip

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I posted a review on Airbnb of the drama but they took it down stating I posted ‘sensitive content’ but have yet to tell me what that is. The host sent me an email with an address that was not the actual address of his unit. He lied. There were multiple codes to enter the elevator and the unit that didn’t work all the time either. There were also signs posted at the elevators stating that they do not allow Airbnb.

Our flight was delayed due to weather issues. We had to overnight in Nashville. I told the host and he said to call when we arrived in Miami. A full day after our initial check-in time, we arrived. It was when I called a second time notifying him of our arrival that the host revealed that he purposefully emailed me the wrong address. The real address was two blocks away. Not only that, he said we could not all enter the building at the same time, could not bring all of our bags in at once nor could we talk to the staff. If they did speak to us, we were to say we were his cousins. The Airbnb ad also said there was free parking; there was no free parking on the street or in the building, just $45 per day.

There was pubic hair in the sheets and pee stains on the mattress. Fingerprints were on most surfaces, the light switches were dirty, there were wet towels in the washing machine, years of dust and dirt buildup in the louvered doors to the laundry closet, the bedsheets were dirty (crumbs, specks of glitter, pen and marker on sheets), and makeup marks on the doorframe of the master bathroom. The toilet cover and seat looked around 50 years old. The toilet bowl was not completely clean. There were dry food pieces in the microwave. The high chair back had no screws. Refrigerator was dirty.

There were fingerprints on the sliding glass door to the balcony that had two metal folding chairs. Blinds were missing pieces and not even long enough to cover the glass on the door that lead to the master bedroom. A few random suspect sheets to change out but nothing matched. The towels looked recycled. There were only three washcloths, recycled from a car wash I suspect.

The host had the nerve to tell us his ‘man’ who was supposed to clean did not have time to finish. How is that even possible when we were a day late? He had the nerve to ask us to wash the sheets and finish drying the wet towels. We immediately went to Walmart and picked up sheets and cleaning supplies. Beforehand he promised to reimburse us for parking, the day we lost and Walmart costs. The time we lost doing this and standing in the longest line ever can never be repaid.

We told Airbnb about these issues but the first thing they said to us was we should have called within 24 hours of check-in. How can we call when we didn’t find out until after the time expired? Despite proof of the legitimate flight delay and proof that he waited 24 hours to reveal the real address, Airbnb refused to refund us outright. Instead they said the host would have to agree. Which of course he did not. The guy even sent me a threatening text message a week after his refusal.

I put up a review, they take it down. Do they take down his bait and switch post? Nope. Airbnb is completely complicit in his scam.

I am going to pay the arbitration fee and go through the process which is required by their terms of service before you sue Airbnb. I will never use this service again. To make matters worse, the unit wasn’t even cheaper than a hotel; it was just a busy weekend in Miami and we couldn’t get anything else close by all of the events we were going to for my sister’s birthday trip.

Athens Airbnb Host Harassed Me Two Times

My Airbnb host accused me of bad behavior, being crazy, and other stuff but left perfect feedback. I’m tired of hosts abusing me in all ways possible and then leaving me perfect feedback. The last one I got was my first negative feedback from a host but even that was not truthful. I asked Airbnb to look into it and provided ample photos too.

My main concern is my former host from a previous booking. He left perfect feedback on my profile since I paid through Airbnb for new linens and a mattress. All of these were ‘spotted with blood’ according to the host (a minor pinkish spot that what I remember) after I personally spent hours cleaning before check out. But okay: he has the right to get 70 euros for new linen and stuff. I paid him.

I bought a brand new expensive electric blanket as the listing’s heating didn’t work although I had it on all day (and was paying extra for electricity). I left that in the listing, I also left a brand new radio-clock that I bought during my stay. I bought utensils for the kitchen as the others were old. I stayed for more than two months so I treated the place as my home.

The host said I never informed him and that I’m a ‘mad person.’ He initially got 50 euros for cleaning fees cause he provided proof to Airbnb I did not leave the premises spotless. Indeed I didn’t, so I paid. But I did clean as I usually do. Then, and only after I got my first negative feedback by the host claiming I was very dirty and not a communicative person, he asked for 70 euros for broken or dirty items (linens with blood stains and a foam mattress that I had to clean at the last minute and dress up which took hours). I don’t even want to add here that I had medical issues that are not going to kill me soon but make me suffer, like high hypertension.

I paid again but I don’t get that if he saw the blood — it was a month ago when I left the listing — why didn’t he ask for money for the blood stain back then as opposed to now (it’s one tiny pinkish area that I actually washed a lot before checking out)? This was on a blanket that actually it slides into a duvet and I did not soil his duvets. I thought I would get away with it since he can slide the washed up blanket into a duvet but nope, I have to pay 25 euro for 1 tiny pinky and washed in washing machine blood stain.

I could involve Airbnb as mediator but I’m afraid of him. He seemed from day one an extremely aggressive person and has some sort of issue against me which I cannot explain. I’m not responsible for the misogyny of Airbnb hosts. If they want to harass a woman, claiming she is a horrible dirty woman, I think I’ll paid what they ask, but I have lots of complaints too. Nothing worked in that apartment. I was freezing: the boiler for the shower didn’t work, the heater didn’t work, and I had to fork out 80 euros just for a heated blanket to survive the snowy days. I left that in the listing plus a brand new 30-euro alarm clock. All that did not make the host relax a little about his hate towards me, which I don’t get.

False Advertising for Unsanitary Airbnb in the Mountains

I stayed at an Airbnb for a family ski trip with adults, children and grandparents age 6 to 70. This trip was a Christmas gift to my family.

Upon check in, I advised the host that there was an entire dishwasher with unclean dirty caked-on dishes. She apologized, said she hired new cleaning ladies and would talk to them, stated she would send someone over the next day to empty the dishwasher but never did. I cleaned other people’s dirty dishes before we even dirtied any.

The property was run down and not the cleanest, and became unsanitary when the snow melted on Feb. 16. There was no Xbox as advertised, and the pool table not functional. The hot tub was dirty and cloudy and not full. The host sent over a maintenance man who put chemicals into the hot tub and said he would be back in the morning to fill it and never came back or fixed anything else. The hot tub was cloudy, remained dirty until the day we left and was missing a foot of water.

The property advertised a large deck with mountain views which was full of snow, not shoveled or maintained and not usable. The snow began to melt and when it did there was about 20 piles of dog feces all over the deck, becoming unsanitary. The host refused to take responsibility or acknowledge the issue and even went as far as falsely claiming that I left the dog feces — we do not own a pet or a dog and did not bring a dog on this property. Airbnb also did not care about this issue.

The conditions of this place were very embarrassing and became absolutely unsanitary. What was very sad were the tactics and nastiness the host has used against me. She went from apologizing to bullying when she didn’t get her way. She called me a disgusting human, a liar, a hypocrite, and a scammer and accused me of planning this to try and get a free trip.

I am a professional person, an ambulance communications officer and investigator and of good moral character. I did not want a free trip; I wanted a clean Airbnb with everything as advertised and just some respect and fairness and truth. I have absolutely no words to describe how sad this makes me and how disappointed I am in the accommodations but moreover how the host treated me as a customer, how she bullied me and was completely dishonest to try to push her agenda against my claim.

The worst part was that there was zero accountability from the host and Airbnb in regards to this which inevitably means they face no repercussions and will do it again, which does not sit right with me. This was my first vacation since COVID started and I don’t want anyone else to get sick or have their time ruined by unsanitary conditions.

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Dominican Republic Property Not as Advertised for Anniversary

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Here’s my first and last experience with Airbnb. My wife, a friend and I rented a condo in April 2021 after reading positive reviews. This was to be a long-term stay for January, February, and March in Juan Dolio, the Dominican Republic.

Our friend arrived on Jan. 1. He called me after arrival and said the place was a dump but he was somewhat vague even saying he was not in the right condo unit. I was now worried. At that moment our hosts showed up; I could hear them in the background laughing. The following day I called my friend and asked what happened. He said he was still in the same unit and it was still a dump. I was still in Canada but flying out later that afternoon with my wife.

I called the host and told her my concerns and said I was thinking of canceling our flights. She assured me everything was fine and if there were any problems they would be rectified. On this assurance we decided to go. We told the host we would not be arriving at the condo till after midnight. She said this would be no problem as the reception is open 24 hours and they would register us and she would leave a key with them.

We arrived as said after midnight, registered and asked for the key. No key was left. We went up to the 12th floor and proceeded to try and wake our friend which took some time. By now exhausted from the travel, we decided to go to bed and face things afresh in the morning. The bedding and pillows smelt musty.

We awoke in the morning, and our fears were confirmed. It was a dump: filthy walls, cobwebs, cupboards falling off the hinges, rusted out washer and dryer, broken dishwasher not attached to the cupboard, all three showers broken, filthy stained couches, soiled mattress with what looked like urine and blood stains, patio furniture covered with blankets to hide the stains. This place was just plain worn out. It slept up to ten people and we believed it was a Party Palace where it was rented and trashed. We paid $4,300 CDN for the month of January expecting a luxury rental condo, not this dump.

We asked our next door neighbours to come take a look and they agreed it was disgusting and a health hazard. I am not a toxicologist but there appeared to be mold on the walls and furniture. It was definitely not COVID compliant. Our neighbours took us next door to have a look at their place; it was night and day in comparison.

I called the host to complain. She sent up the maintenance guy. I refused him entry and told her it was unfixable and she needed to come over. She said she would be there later then late afternoon cancelled, saying she would come the next day. I didn’t know it then but I was being played. If she came the next day the 24 hours to report to Airbnb would have expired.

The following day she showed up. I showed her the pictures on my iPad and she said it would be fixed. I told her it was beyond fixing , and she said she would move us. This was on Jan. 4. It was left this way on the understanding we would be moved to be notified later.

That day we went to the beach to try and relax. The beach area and surrounding grounds were amazing and beautiful, just what we anticipated. We returned to the condo around 3:30 PM to be met with a crew of six and the host in the condo without our permission. Two painters, two maintenance guys, two cleaners and the host were replacing showers and the washer and dryer, painting, cleaning, taking away part of the couch in all this chaos, and more the next day.

While it was good they acted quickly we were on vacation; nobody needs to go through this nonsense. They also painted over these black mouldy walls I still believe were a health hazard. The stained mattress was still in place, and there was a broken dishwasher and cupboards.

We got in touch with Airbnb. I spoke with 11 agents getting absolutely nowhere. We had sleepless nights from a bar directly below our tower that blasted music until 3:30 AM. Dogs were barking, chickens crowing, and cars racing and backfiring loud exhaust. After being passed on from agent to agent and specifically asking them the question over and over with no response and being told over and over “my shift is about to end, I will pass this on to the next available agent.”

We had our couch returned after being gone for 11 days. Each time we asked about the couch we were told by the host it was still drying after being cleaned — it was 30 degrees C. This was on Jan. 15, an unforgettable day in our lives. We decided on that day, we would stay until Jan. 31 having paid $4,300 Cdn and move on to new accommodation, thereby terminating our rental agreement due to no contact with the host or Airbnb to rectify our disgusting rental unit.

At first the host was okay with this, then she went ballistic with over 50 threatening texts telling us we were to vacate the premises by 11:00 AM the following day giving us 20 hours to pack and find other accommodation, she said cleaners would be at the condo at 11:00 AM and it had already been rented out the same day.

I contacted Airbnb with numerous emails telling them we were being evicted and this was an emergency situation. We needed help, and nobody replied. This day was to be unforgettable as our host also knew this as I had told her and she had recommended a nice restaurant for us to celebrate our “50th Golden
Wedding Anniversary.” I was fuming; I am in my early 70s and my wife will soon be 80. To evict an elderly couple with 20 hours’ notice to find other accommodation in the Dominican Republic on the weekend is reprehensible. Needless to say, our anniversary was ruined.

On the good side, I was able to secure accommodation through a local realtor team who really came through and found us a nice two bedroom. It was the same location in a different tower. Had we dealt with this exceptionally good team, we probably would have stayed but we returned back to Canada on Jan. 22. Airbnb rewarded our host with $4,300 and gave us a $24 refund.

That is why l will never use Airbnb again. I now tell all my friends and acquaintances to be beware. Thanks for reading.

Poorly Cleaned Crack Den Passes for an Airbnb Listing?

Without going into the minutiae, the property was not as advertised (graphically or descriptively) on the web page through deceptive and misleading photography and unbelievably optimistic interpretation of the property condition, style and “vibe”. It was so incredibly dirty that it would not be addressed by an additional visit by a cleaner in the duration of the stay and very distressed throughout with burns on curtains, water marks on soft furnishings, dozens of scuff marks on floors and walls, chipped enamel, raised floor tiles, dirty, thread bare “linen”.

It was also potentially unsafe. The appearance and demeanor of the host’s assistant was not inviting at all: scruffy denim, no teeth, fell out of a scruffy white van on arrival and could barely walk straight or string a sentence together gave us the distinct feeling that he was a drug addict.

Based on this, we immediately complained to Airbnb, hastily took photos (because of safety issues) and left the property as advised by Airbnb. The host reached out to us within the hour and offered a further cleaning of the property. We declined as we had no intention of returning to the property as this was not the main issue. The host subsequently offered us another apartment in the same building. We declined this offer as we felt that any customer good faith had be irrevocably destroyed. In the meantime we started a full refund request from Airbnb.

Over the next several days we struggled greatly to deal with the process with many response delays, misinformation and lies from the various Airbnb Ambassadors. Eventually Airbnb summarily rejected our complaint but offered us a $500 good will gesture refund. We rejected this outright with the intention of reclaiming all our money.

Shady Superhost Makes Airbnb Stay a Nightmare

I booked a comfortable little apartment in Quebec for my family vacation this summer and it turned out to have a crazy owner and a crazy drunk neighbor with a dog who bit my child and who killed a hen in front of our eyes. The place was dirty, with an inch of dust and hairs on the floors, and strange stains on the upholstery of the chairs. It smelled like a medieval pub. The dishwasher was rusty with broken parts, the rust stayed on the presumably washed dishes afterwards.

The place was so small that once you got in the room there was no air; you had to keep the window open all the time and there was no mosquito netting in either bedroom. The host was crazy; he insisted on entering the premises while we were out, lying that the previous tenant forgot a coffee maker. One day he thought there was nobody home and tried to get in the house, but it was locked and as I shouted he ran off.

He found occasion to come every day. Once he walked with a chainsaw back and forth in the backyard, which was creepy enough for me. The neighbor is a crazy local drunk that drank wine and then got in her car with a friend of hers. There was a child with them as well. She assured me that her dog was very well behaved and I let my children play with him. At one point the dog started chewing my son’s shoes and at the end he attacked my son, knocked him to the ground, and bit him. The dog owner was drunk and didn’t even care enough to do something. Several days later the same dog killed one of the other neighbor’s hens in front of our eyes.

On top of everything, the host left an awful review on my Airbnb profile claiming that I broke his fan and the garden parasol, which was a complete lie. I was mislead by all the positive reviews on his profile and I wondered how someone can give five stars for a broken rusty dishwasher, dirty floors, non-working TV, dirty old magazines and broken kitchen table. The only explanation for me is that these are his friends.

On top of it, there were three spoons in the kitchen, three bowls and three tea cups for a family of four. I claimed a certain amount of the paid sum from Airbnb but they did nothing. The host also refused of course. The price was equal to a hotel stay and I regret not making a reservation in the nearby hotels. There were hotels much more close to the national park and way more beautiful and clean. The property is on a provincial road with a 90 km speed limit. The closest shop was 2 km away and there was nothing in it.

Guest Cancels and Leaves, But Still Charged

We booked a week in a property starting July 17, 2021. When we arrived, we found the accommodation to be very unsatisfactory. Initially on inspection we discovered the accommodation only had five beds yet our party consisted of six people. When you’ve paid £2,250 for a week you don’t expect to be offered a camp bed.

When we first arrived, the cleaner was still there mopping the floor. The maintenance chap was also there. Neither were wearing face masks. In the listing advertising the property it stated (and still does) a 100-inch HDTV. However, there was no big TV: it was actually 24 inches.

As we closely inspected the place, we discovered the kitchen area to be unclean, the utensils were very dirty, and there was a used tissue in one of the drawers. The biggest shock was the state of the double oven. On opening the first door we could clearly see it hadn’t been cleaned and was in very poor condition. When opening the second door we discovered someone’s leftover pie. The cleaner quickly snatched it and hid it behind her back. The entire kitchen was in a very poor condition and certainly not what you’d expect for that amount of money. The garden area was untidy, with the grass not cut and loose tiles on the path.

On contacting the host, we found him to be rude, swearing and suggesting we were being unreasonable. We had just completed a six-hour journey to find our booking wasn’t to any satisfactory standard. We very luckily found alternative accommodation 30 minutes away so our stay at the Airbnb lasted only two hours.

On contacting Airbnb that evening telling them about all the problems and supplying photo evidence, at no point were we told to cancel the reservation until three days later, which meant we received £550 out of the £2,250 paid. Unfortunately for us, Airbnb took the host’s side and stood by the decision not to give us a full refund, which astonished us after sending the photo evidence.

A few days later, I decided to request a charge back on my credit card. Within a week we had our money back on our card and felt relieved, until my card company reversed the decision to uphold the chargeback and now I am £1,700 out of pocket for accommodations I couldn’t and didn’t stay at. I’m still contacting Airbnb and the host but not really getting anywhere. I’m desperate for any help or advice on what to do next. I feel I have a very strong case but unsure what to do. Any advice would be appreciated.

Airbnb Host Lies in Review After Disastrous Stay

We rented a three-bedroom apartment in Split, Croatia on the first floor using Airbnb. The host posted the same listing on Booking.com and Expedia too. At that time I did not know that my dream vacation would turn into a nightmare.

Let me start saying that the host is providing misleading information on the post. As per the description, it should be a deluxe apartment with a nice garden and air-conditioned accommodations. Sounds like a dream. It was a little expensive but the pictures were amazing; you can see a brand-new place with a garden and pool. I thought it was worth it. Such a mistake.

The location was not so good as advertised, but it was fine. The apartment was extremely dirty with hazards inside.
The place was hot, like 100 degrees F hot (+30/+35 Celsius) and all three bedrooms did not have AC. There were two ancient AC units in the living room and dining room. (Why the host has two AC units in one room, I do not know).

Two out of the three bedrooms did not have mosquito screens. As a result, I got a lot of mosquito bites during the night or could have slept in the hot box without the air. My son has asthma and he could not even breathe in the steamy hot bedroom. As result, my kids were sleeping, starting from the second night, on the sofa in the living room.

AC was not only a problem. In the master bedroom, we found blood stains on the mattress cover sheets. Super nasty. I sent pictures to the host in no time. She promised to remove the dirty sheets the next day, but it never happened. Also, all over the apartment were spider webs. Besides that, between window frames, there was a crazy number of dead bugs.

I opened the closet and I found old, dirty shoes. The closet inside was dirty too, and there were stains on the sofa and walls. The moldings on the floor were not fully attached. One of the bedrooms had a bleach stain on the cover. Generally, it was the dirtiest place we stayed in ever.

The washing machine was broken and discharge water was on the floor. I had to clean the water. There were exposed wires at electric outlets near the bed and wires all over the place, which could have caught fire in no time. My favorite example: a lamp in the bathroom had a wire exposed — good luck not getting electrocuted when you turn on the switch.

The pool was not usable. It was closed, and we could not even open it. In the listing’s picture, it clearly shows a beautiful pool. There was no mention on the listing that the pool was not in service, which is very misleading too.

The person who rents this apartment does not take care of the safety conditions. I sent many pictures and messages to the host within 30 minutes after checking in that I was not happy with the condition of the place, but she ignored my concerns. Airbnb asked me why I did not leave and fight later. Really, it is easy to say just go on the street, in another country and find a place to sleep with two kids, when you paid crazy money for this place and do not have a budget to pay another $2,300. Airbnb will not cover the cost.

After we left, the host posted fraudulent claims on Airbnb. The host stated as a fact that I asked for a refund for “the entire stay.” I never did this; I never thought it was an option before the review appeared and I called customer service to find out why the host was claiming this.

The host posted a review on Sept. 17. To create an escalation ticket regarding this fraudulent claim, I have to request a refund according to Airbnb policy. My request was created on Sept. 22. I did not request anything before her response. The refund requested was only for 22% of the total amount as punitive damages for the dirty apartment and false accusations. I was on and off with Airbnb customer service for a week. I had to provide pictures and videos to prove that the place was dirty.

The host also claimed that bloodstains were from me. I did report this issue right away, but no one cared. Actually, customer service said that I must provide proof that I reported stains right away and it was not my fault. I did report it on their website; they were too lazy to check.

A customer service representative said that according to Airbnb policy, hosts can post any false claim because it is only their opinion and does not need further investigation. Really? Hosts can post anything? Any false accusations? Nice to know.

Summarizing all this, Airbnb refused to help me with my concerns and stated that: “While we encourage and expect all community members to post reviews that contain objective and accurate information, Airbnb doesn’t mediate disputes concerning the truth of reviews. We expect the author of the review to stand behind the content of their review.”

Also, I requested Airbnb to check the misleading and false information regarding the apartment descriptions like the AC and pool, but they refused to do it. Every day I requested to talk to a manager, but my request was never satisfied. Airbnb only takes money and does not help with any issues. It’s so sad that people will pay money to this dishonest person and fees to Airbnb.

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Lost $1000 to Avoid Sleeping in Filthy Airbnb

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Once you click “book” on Airbnb, your money is gone. Misrepresentation and filth are not enough to get your money back. I booked what was represented as a beautiful waterfront home where I could work for a week. I booked just a couple days in advance.

Upon arrival, it was a rundown cabin, part of a rundown crowded campground. On top of that, the place was filthy with sticky residue on the appliances, light switches and mystery drippings on the walls. The bathroom was disgusting with a moldy shower curtain and orange slick grime that’s hard to see in the pictures. The grounds were a mess with cars, debris and junk.

I texted the owner via the app immediately (because all communications had been through the app). I said the place was not at all what was represented and that I was leaving immediately. She did not respond. I immediately contacted Airbnb via the app as well and they did not respond either.

The next day Airbnb got back to me to say they had to ask the host for the refund. I never heard from the host. Surprise: the host declined. I suggested a 50% refund to settle, which was generous in my opinion. Airbnb said I needed to go back and take pictures (a two-hour drive). I made the trip back to the property and took pictures of a clearly moldy shower curtain, sticky surfaces and junky grounds. The host noticed that I was returning to take pictures, so the property was actually an improvement compared to the views on my original arrival.

Airbnb said the host refused the refund because I didn’t speak to her in person. When did that become a requirement? Then they told me they could not refund the money because I didn’t take the pictures that first day and never explained why they sent me back there. I gave up and posted a negative review on Yelp and cancelled my Airbnb account. I lost over $1,000 to avoid staying in filth. I will never use Airbnb again and frankly think this sort of thing needs to be better regulated.

Months later, a person I suspect to be a friend of the owner tried to comment on my Yelp review but that was rejected. The post was just a bunch of name calling. Now more than nine months later, the owner apparently did some research to find out my profession (attorney) and posted a response to my Yelp review trying to deflect from the photos of the grossness and reality of the junky grounds. I never mentioned my profession.

Another guest recently posted more photos on Yelp of the disgusting level of filth complete with another moldy shower, exploded food left by others in the microwave and more. Airbnb has yet to hold this property owner accountable despite pictures. Even the more positive Yelp reviews from guests expecting a campground experience note the need for better maintenance.

The stalking behavior by the owner in digging around to find out about my profession so many months later is disturbing on a whole different level. And there is yet another Yelp review describing how the host cussed out their group when they complained about the mess.

What does it take for Airbnb to hold a host accountable? I read an article about a Boy Scout troop that booked a place in Florida. When they contacted Airbnb to report that two different listings were using the same information, Airbnb protected the hosts. The Boy Scout troop showed up to literally no place to stay and it made the news. Apparently you need a news story to hold hosts accountable if they are making money for Airbnb.

Don’t trust Airbnb for reviews. When I tried to post my review on Airbnb, it mysteriously went into the cosmos. When the world settles down a little bit, I think we need to look to our legislators and consumer protection laws to make some changes. In the meantime, I suggest using VRBO and VACASA. They cost a little more but they also have higher standards in my experience. Take lots of pictures upon arrival in case you need documentation for any reason and let karma take care of the rest.

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Listing from Hell and the Song that Made it Worse

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I showed up, escaping Hurricane Ida, to an Airbnb in Houston. It’s Labor Day weekend and we had dogs in tow, so the pickings were slim. Still, this looked okay. Four of us were splitting the property; it was 3 bedroom/3 bath, a townhouse, in a nice part of town. I lived up the street when I came here for medical treatment two years ago.

I showed up and there was no key where it was supposed to be. The provided garage door opener didn’t work. The entire place smelled like mothballs and the modem and router were on the floor in the foyer. There were giant stains on the carpet up and down the stairs. It wasn’t clean and hadn’t been vacuumed. The furniture was split and there was just a sofa. No other furniture was provided in the living room. There were large water stains where some of the plaster had fallen from the ceiling in the living room.

There was a pool table (“don’t sit on the pool table” as if it was some heirloom and not a piece of crap from Walmart) but no tables — literally no tables anywhere. There were two stools to use at the counter in the kitchen. No coffee table. No end tables. The third bedroom was also locked from the inside.

The best part was that the host called himself “Premier Lux.” There was a plastic wrapper on the box spring of one of the beds. None of the bedsheets had been changed. You could see the outline where someone had slept in it. I refused to touch any of the linens because this screamed “bedbugs” to me (and I’m far from bug phobic). There was a large cardboard box of dirty laundry in the laundry room.

To recap: it was filthy, I couldn’t lock the front door and one of the bedrooms was mysteriously inaccessible because it was locked from the inside. I kept wondering “who is in there?” The entire place looked like a crew of eight 20-year-old frat boys had just moved out a few days before after a four day bender.

I turned to Airbnb (I am a host in New Orleans, so I know their drill pretty well). To make it “better.” Airbnb put me on hold to get a “Support Ambassador” on the line. So it started. Their horrible Airbnb song — you know the one, in which the waify girl singer that they always play on repeat to make people hang up, saying “Followww me”? Follow her right to the depths of hell.

The support person claimed he had to come back every two minutes to ask me again “may I put you back on hold” and the song started over again from the beginning. You heard that right. He claimed he had to get “permission” to put me on hold again. I’m 57 years old. I’ve never encountered that particular piece of customer service nonsense.

If I had any hair left, I would’ve pulled it out. It took 45 minutes for a “support ambassador” to come on the line. So I listened to the first two minutes of that “song” (it’s really a musical abortion) 22 times. Ultimately Airbnb made it right and refunded all of my money (and added a $200 coupon for next time), but not before adding heavily to my post-hurricane stress and aggravating me beyond measure. When they cancelled the reservation (and refunded my money) it was as if the host had cancelled, so I can’t leave a review. The listing is still there for the next sucker.

Needless to say, the host never responded to my phone calls, Airbnb messages or text messages to his phone. He’s a scuzzball who should be banned from Airbnb, but likely will not. I’m only posting one photo because it was the most bizarre. The huge box of dirty laundry waiting to be washed. That kind of summed the whole place up in a nutshell.