You made your travel plans knowing how long it would take to reach the city, could’ve checked the property wasn’t centrally located at the time of booking, and also displayed illogical thinking of how a night/stay in a property works. AirBnB, much like a hotel and other lodgings, doesn’t book stays on a 24-hour/calendar day basis, but on nights. So, it’s no surprise you couldn’t be accommodated even when claiming early check-in (which it wasn’t, as it’d be considered a late check-in for the 7th). Having arrived overnight from the 7th to the 8th, this particular time is pertaining to the previous calendar day; I’ll fault both the host and you for any exchange about this though, perhaps the host was confused all along because of language issues. As a guest myself I would’ve never called arriving at 1AM an early check-in for that day (if the host specifies a check-in time of 4PM that’s being 15 hours earlier, which I think is rather dubious).

As for the other things, I just think one bad taste soured the entire experience. Being confused that the host was a smoker and thought she was free to smoke in her own property? Complaining about an amenity (electric kettle) that perhaps the property never guaranteed to have? Taking the word of a host you already disliked about how long it would take to get anywhere when you could’ve just Googled it yourself? I think you also blindsided her, if she was surprised to see you were still there and hadn’t left, perhaps she just said she wanted to say goodbye as an excuse to stay and check things (I’d wager you seemed unpleasant to her with the whole early check-in fiasco and being at the property when she believed otherwise).

Overall, this was much ado about nothing.